To start out, I thought I would change the name of the blog because...well, I was bored with the other name (which I chose hastily, for lack of a more clever title). Mind the gap is a phrase the Brits use to mean "watch your step". There are "mind the gap" signs posted all over the Tube stations and train stations. It is a typical British phrase, putting something just a little differently than we do. T-shirts with "mind the gap" written across them are popular. Then, there is, of course, the physical gap between us and those of you who read this blog, so...Bob's your uncle (another way of saying, "there you have it").
Now on to the Gloriously Odd Town Names...
On our recent trip to Dover I had some time to kill while I waited for Rhett and the kids to finish up "extreme" hiking on the famous white cliffs. So, as is habit, I reached for a book. The only book available was an English atlas we had with us. I turned the page to the area we live and was lazily looking over the names of towns around us, when I saw Six Mile Bottom. What a great name! So I looked some more and kept finding these wonderfully wierd town and village names. Searching out these odd towns has become somewhat of an obsession, and has amused me for a few months.
It doesn't seem too hard to figure out how some of these towns got their names, but for others, I am just left with a puzzled look on my face. I thought I would share some of the names I have found and hope it amuses you as much as it has amused me.
Itchingfield
Burnham-on-Crouch
Bath (the cleanest place in England)
Womenswold
St. Just-in-Roseland (get him outside of Roseland and he trades
his halo for horns!)
Herodsfoot
Crumplehorn
Blubberhouses (but they have lovely personalities)
Budge's Shop
Botusflemming Notter (is that even English?)
Slapton
Boohay
Coffinswell (is it, though?)
Combeinteignhead (I am sure this is Olde English for "I got the
comb stuck in my hair again")
Budleigh Salterton (note to Jamie Melin: sounds like
a great name for a little boy, and you know none of the other boys in school will have the same name)
Beer (a real "man's" town)
Great Weeke
Rumps Point
Headcorn (it's where the hair style "corn rows" originated)
Denton
Lower Peover
Upper Peover
Cross o' th' Hands
Bunny (now that's just cute!)
Hose
Breedon on the Hill (stay away from that hill on Saturday nights!)
No Man's Heath
Sheepy Parva (by far, my favorite!!!)
Barton in the Beans
Blaby (we just can't stop talking about how great this town is)
Bitchfield (the female version of being "in the dog house"??)
Needingworth (a town full of people with self esteem issues)
Upton Snodsbury (which is located right next to ...)
White Ladies Aston (my second favorite :) )
Dummer
Three Legged Cross (huh?)
Droop (a town with less energy)
Oxenpill (imagine the size of that pill!)
Butleigh (which is next to...)
Butleigh Wooton (so nice they named it twice)
Hand and Pen
Inkpen
Hopes Nose (it's sooo green here)
Newton with Scales (you laugh, but not everybody has scales...
it's something to brag about)
Much Hoole (again, huh?)
Locking Stumps
Ramsbottoms
Turton Bottoms
Dunnockshaw Love Clough (sounds like Celtic ebonics)
Triangle (lol)
Upperthong
Netherthong (kind of put off by Upperthong, yet
absolutely afraid of Netherthong)
Holyland Nether
Whatstandwell
Near Cotton (a new form of polyester that's softer than before)
Netheravon (where under achieving Avon ladies
are sent; incidently, they are now accepting special cases
from Mary Kay and Amway)
Mary's Hoo
Dumpton
Broadstairs (now, them are braggin' rights)
Bapchild
Tong
Goodnestone
Old Wives Lees
Upper Harbledown (say that ten times fast)
Rough Common (not an easy place to grow up)
Ratling
Sandwich
Barfestone
Paddlesworth
Bossingham (don't you hate it when your pig
starts ordering you around?)
Three Chimneys
Smarden Bell Smarden (I don't get it)
Pluckley Thorne
*these next four towns are all close to each other*
Dymchurch
Newchurch
Ivychurch
Woodchurch
Baldslow (who needs Rogaine when you can live here?)
Barking
Thong
New Barn
Locksbottom
Elmer's End
Tooting
Tooting Bec
Much Birch (but few oak)
Much Dew Church
Cross Ash (what you have left after a cross fire)
Crickadarn
Powderham (just add 'Waterloo', or the next town)
Canworthy Water (water fit for watering the garden or
rehydrating powderham)
Broadwoodwidger (sounds like the name of a racehorse)
Minions
Portwrinkle
Crafthole
London Apprentice (it's a thankless job)
Barripper
Westward Ho! (seriously, it even has the exclamation point after it)
Hole
Sheepwash (sheepwax is extra)
Virginstow (hummm?)
Chaddlehanger
Harrowbarrow (home of Henny Penny, Chicken Licken,
Turkey Lurkey)
Frogwell (yes, he's fine, thank you)
Luckwell Bridge
Four Forks (but no spoons)
Swimbridge (doesn't invoke feelings of confidence)
Wookey (the hometown of Chewbacca)
Catsgore
Little Load (is right next to)
Long Load
Tintinhull
Odcombe
Curry Mallet
Burnworthy (the people weren't that impressed
with this town from the get go)
Axmouth (yikes)
Exmouth (yeah, that used to be my mouth
but we broke up)
Jack-in-the-Green (as if a Jack-in-the-box isn't
scarey enough, there's one waiting to pop
up out of the grass)
Lower Upcott
Uplowman
Craze Lowman
Otter St. Mary (ooookay)
Downhead
Temple Cloud (just lovely)
Chewton Mandip (an exclusive town, for members only, of
female cannibals)
Evercreech
Beer Hacket
Hamlet
Piddletrenthide (obviously didn't hide it well enough
if the whole town knows about it)
White Lackington (don't tell anyone from the ACLU)
Piddlehinton
Hillbutts
*these next five towns are all in the same area*
Tolpuddle
Puddletown
Affpuddle
Briantspuddle
Turners Puddle
Overcombe (where Donald Trump grew up)
East Creech
*these next three towns are all in the same area*
Over Wallop (when your mom hits you just one
more time because you made her so mad)
Middle Wallop
Nether Wallop (the wallop of no return)
Well, I have more but I also have four kids, a husband, and a Kayla to feed, so I must go make dinner. I'll post some more from time to time.